AND MARY AND JOSEPH TRAVELED TO THE HOUSE OF THE MOUSE, AND THERE WAS NO ROOM AT THE SUPER-8
Well, I filled out the yearly company ethics compliance form, so I'm ready to pack it in for the year. I almost stumbled on that Import and Export Control Law question, but it turns out that guys from Cyprus searching for photos of Bitty Schram nude and accidentally reading my sniper jokes doesn't count.
The wife and I are headed to Orlando for Christmas, where I can now get into Disney World and Universal for free due to family connections. I'm practically one of the Bushes when I'm down there now. Now if I can only get an inside track into this place, I'll be all set. I'd sure love to get my hands on a Joseph of Arimathea bobblehead doll!
Wednesday, December 17, 2003
YOU FORGOT WHAT'S HIS NAME
Here's my impression of every interview ever conducted about the Blues on NPR:
INTERVIEWER: ...W.C. Handy...Robert Johnson...Leadbelly...Mississippi John Hurt...Billie Holliday...Bo Diddley.
INTERVIEWEE: ...Blind Willie Johnson...Buddy Guy...John Lee Hooker...Muddy Waters...B.B. King...Howlin' Wolf...Etta James...
etc.
There are words where the ellipses are, but they are completely interchangeable from one interview to the next.
Here's my impression of every interview ever conducted about the Blues on NPR:
INTERVIEWER: ...W.C. Handy...Robert Johnson...Leadbelly...Mississippi John Hurt...Billie Holliday...Bo Diddley.
INTERVIEWEE: ...Blind Willie Johnson...Buddy Guy...John Lee Hooker...Muddy Waters...B.B. King...Howlin' Wolf...Etta James...
etc.
There are words where the ellipses are, but they are completely interchangeable from one interview to the next.
Tuesday, December 16, 2003
THE BUTTERFLY EFFECT
I'll be using this post to test either the awesome power of my jinxability, or my complete ineffectualness (yes, that is a word).
The two NFL teams I follow, the New England Patriots, who have been my team since I was 9 years old, and the Philadelphia Eagles, who I root for principally because rooting against them may be hazardous to my health where I live, are a combined 19-0 since October 12th, when the Eagles lost to the Cowboys. I haven't mentioned the two winning streaks here in this space, or done much more than merely contemplate this fact, for fear of somehow affecting the outcome of the games. This is irrational of course, but somehow palpably logical nonetheless, based on empirical evidence dating from my childhood (see New England Patriots team history, 1976-2000 for supporting documentation). My capacity for negatively influencing sports teams extends to baseball, where the New York Mets had a lengthy run of fetidness throughout my adolescent years. The Mets eventually had the great fortune to meet the Boston Red Sox in the World Series in 1986, successfully using this team's vast ill-fated nature as a shield against my relatively puny one. No baseball team that I follow has since managed to overcome my deletirious impact, although the teams in question, the Chicago White Sox, Houston Astros, and Philadelphia Phillies, have some serious karma issues of their own. Getting back to the Patriots, they also surmounted my bad mojo, winning their only Super Bowl title in 2002. I still haven't figured that one out. I think I was just having a bad day.
In any case, this year the Pats and Eagles are each on a roll, and nothing I do seems to be able to stop it. Hence this post. I mean, why even have a weblog if you can't demonstrate your natural gifts? So, to that end, WOOOO-HOOOOO!!! Go Pats! Go Eagles! Win the rest of your regular season games, win two playoff games, and you guys are headed to Super Bowl XXXVIII! You can do it! Super Bowl bound! See you in Houston! WOOOO-
HOOOOO!!!
There. To the eventual Super Bowl champs: You owe me.
I'll be using this post to test either the awesome power of my jinxability, or my complete ineffectualness (yes, that is a word).
The two NFL teams I follow, the New England Patriots, who have been my team since I was 9 years old, and the Philadelphia Eagles, who I root for principally because rooting against them may be hazardous to my health where I live, are a combined 19-0 since October 12th, when the Eagles lost to the Cowboys. I haven't mentioned the two winning streaks here in this space, or done much more than merely contemplate this fact, for fear of somehow affecting the outcome of the games. This is irrational of course, but somehow palpably logical nonetheless, based on empirical evidence dating from my childhood (see New England Patriots team history, 1976-2000 for supporting documentation). My capacity for negatively influencing sports teams extends to baseball, where the New York Mets had a lengthy run of fetidness throughout my adolescent years. The Mets eventually had the great fortune to meet the Boston Red Sox in the World Series in 1986, successfully using this team's vast ill-fated nature as a shield against my relatively puny one. No baseball team that I follow has since managed to overcome my deletirious impact, although the teams in question, the Chicago White Sox, Houston Astros, and Philadelphia Phillies, have some serious karma issues of their own. Getting back to the Patriots, they also surmounted my bad mojo, winning their only Super Bowl title in 2002. I still haven't figured that one out. I think I was just having a bad day.
In any case, this year the Pats and Eagles are each on a roll, and nothing I do seems to be able to stop it. Hence this post. I mean, why even have a weblog if you can't demonstrate your natural gifts? So, to that end, WOOOO-HOOOOO!!! Go Pats! Go Eagles! Win the rest of your regular season games, win two playoff games, and you guys are headed to Super Bowl XXXVIII! You can do it! Super Bowl bound! See you in Houston! WOOOO-
HOOOOO!!!
There. To the eventual Super Bowl champs: You owe me.
Monday, December 15, 2003
BACK AND TO THE LEFT...BACK AND TO THE LEFT
There's been another shooting death at Dealey Plaza.
Surviving members of the Warren Commission have already blamed Lee Harvey Oswald for the killing. Oliver Stone is working on a film that fingers LBJ, the Military-Industrial Complex, Pro-Castro Cubans, Anti-Castro Cubans, the Mafia, and aliens from the planet B46-J. Robert Caro is writing a 3,500 page multi-volume work where he never actually mentions it.
There's been another shooting death at Dealey Plaza.
Surviving members of the Warren Commission have already blamed Lee Harvey Oswald for the killing. Oliver Stone is working on a film that fingers LBJ, the Military-Industrial Complex, Pro-Castro Cubans, Anti-Castro Cubans, the Mafia, and aliens from the planet B46-J. Robert Caro is writing a 3,500 page multi-volume work where he never actually mentions it.
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