REFINERY WEEKLY NEWS & NOTES
Production: Yes
Safety: Some
Environmental: Not so much
WEEKLY SAFETY SLOGAN CONTEST
The weekly safety slogan contest continues. Get your slogan in to The Safety Department by Friday to be eligible. Slogans that contain profanity, lewdness, sexual double entendres and rampant grammatical errors will continue to be rejected.
HEALTH AND FITNESS NEWS
As it turns out, exercise is good for you! If you can possibly drag yourself to the gym after a soul destroying day at work, we highly recommend it. If not, well, try, um, I don't know, walking more or something. Or buy one of those CROSSBOW HOME GYMs.
NEWS YOU CAN USE
Arbor Day is coming up. Plant a tree to help release some of that massive guilt that's been building up because you're a cog in the great petroleum machine.
BLOOD DRIVE
WE NEED BLOOD! We're so desperate, we've decided to toss out that silly sexual history questionnaire. We figure, it's better to get some blood and contract HIV than to lay there and die. It should be good for the pharmaceutical companies, anyway.
ETHICS LINE
1-800-YEAH-RIGHT
"Make Us Some Money, And Try Not To Get Yourself Blown Up"
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