SADDAM HAS LEFT THE BUILDING?



In what must be record time, a conspiracy theorist has already spotted possibly deceased Iraqi dictator Saddam Hussein pumping gas into his car in the Western United States. "Yup, it was Saddam, all right," claimed unemployed welder Clyde Drucker of Winnemucca, Nevada. "I was picking up a Slurpee at the 7-11, and there was Hussein, filling up his Chrysler Le Baron with hi-test. Damnedest thing I ever saw."



Hussein may have been killed by a precision U.S. bombing raid on Wednesday night, but Drucker is hearing none of it. "Oh, come on, are you kidding me? That's what the government would like you to believe. First it was Roswell, then Elvis, and now this. But I seen him, I'm telling you. He was wearing jeans, an 'Old Navy' t-shirt, and snakeskin boots. Now how could I make that up?" The FBI and CIA have refused comment. "See?" asked Drucker.